The computer swallowed grandma
Yes, honestly it’s true.
She pressed ‘control’ and ‘enter’
And disappeared from view.
It devoured her completely.
The thought just makes me squirm.
She must have caught a virus
Or been eaten by a worm.
In desperation, I asked Jeeves
My search it did refine.
The reply from him was negative,
Not a thing was found online.
So, if inside your ‘inbox’
My grandma you should see,
Please ‘copy,’ ‘scan,’ and ‘paste’ her
And send her back to me!*
*unknown author
As yet another September 11th approaches, with a 3-hour televised reading-of-names, we should be asking ourselves why (even after 15 years) these particular lives seem to matter more than others. Regardless of your beliefs about destiny and happenstance or your definition of a true hero, there has never been an event in history that has been as publicly commemorated as this one.
September 11th is now part of our history and our culture – alongside two World Wars, too many genocides and the Holocaust. But we have never before dedicated a single day, every year, to publicly name those millions of people who have perished. Didn’t their lives matter, too?
Tragedy and heartbreak come in many forms – death from disease, arson, shootings, car and plane crashes. Who are we to decide whose death is more horrific or more memorable? We ALL matter both in life and in death. Isn’t it possible that the 9/11 families are not so much ‘honoring’ their dead as making their own lives (and losses) matter more?
New York has renamed countless bridges and streets in honor of politicians, policemen and even sports figures. The 9/11 Memorial, in its entirety, takes up much of downtown Manhattan. Since when isn’t a ‘moment of silence’ – generally heard around the world – enough?
I’ve always felt bad for people born on September 11th. How do you celebrate your special day when there’s such sadness all around? Do children innocently ask their parents why THEIR names aren’t being read aloud? Everyone grieves in a different way but most observances are kept private.
There’s a time and a place for remembrance of all kinds. But I believe it’s up to individuals to take on that personal burden if they so choose. We will never forget the events of September 11,2001. But isn’t the whole point for us to move ON and look FORWARD to a brighter future?
I find it amusing the way some people are hung up on age. I embrace mine. It’s true that age is just a number. And, sure, some days I feel it more than others. But, all in all, I am fairly happy with this new stage of life.
Yesterday I went to the movies. I seldom go because it’s expensive and there isn’t really anything playing that I’m that excited about seeing. And, besides, in a few months time I know I can see it On Demand or, shortly thereafter, I can rent it at my local Redbox.
But this time when I went to the theater, I just showed them my AARP card* and I got in for less than the bargain matinee price. I could also have saved on concessions but I’m a tried and true sneak-in-my-own-candy kinda girl. So get out that discount card and flash it proudly for all to see!
*For those who think you have to be 65 or older to be an AARP member, think again. The age requirement is only 50.
Ever notice that there are more new drugs on the market every day? And just the side effects, alone, can make your pulse quicken. In 2016, we should be curing diseases not still suffering from them. Why is healthy, affordable living so out of our reach?
Watch any black and white film (and even most current ones) and there’s not an actor to be found without his/her lips wrapped around a cigarette. People sometimes have to work at jobs surrounded by carcinogenic substances because that’s all they are qualified to do. We can’t start living in bubbles so what’s a person to do?
It’s true, for the most part, that we are living longer but we’re not fully prepared to care for our loved ones when they reach those new stages of life. Once upon a time, your grandmother might have lived with you and helped raise you while your parents worked. Don’t these same selfless people deserve our love and support? Not everyone can afford to take on that responsibility but… isn’t it worth looking into other options?
It’s not unusual to see multiple videos on social media showing stray animals being rescued and given another chance at life. Shouldn’t we do at least that much for our elders?!
A diamond is forever – with divorce rates up, is that still true?
A dog is man’s best friend – I love dogs as much as the next person but shouldn’t your spouse be your BF?
A skeleton in the closet – let’s hope that isn’t a literal meaning.
A watched pot never boils – a quaint expression but, obviously, untrue.
I understand and appreciate the feeling cited above. But we cannot live fortune cookie lives. We can’t possibly take a few nice words (written on a small, folded piece of paper and shoved inside a dessert) seriously. We hear about tragedy and suffering on the news all day long. We see injustice and cruelty all around us. Sure, it’d be great to live in a world wearing rose-colored glasses but, eventually, reality will cross our path and bite us in the butt.
So, by all means, think positively and be considerate of those around you. But know that, against our better judgment, words CAN sometimes hurt!
As one of our brightest comics, Mr. George Carlin, famously said, “We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch tv too much. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make a living but not a life. We’ve added years to life, not life to years.”
This was a man who never shied away from the truth – whether or not you wanted to hear it. He was a pioneer and a philosopher. He could turn a phrase like no one else. Many people disliked him – probably because he spoke the truth. But he wasn’t afraid to speak his mind. And his mind, at times, was quite brilliant.
There are all kinds of truths including half-truths. Some are ‘for your own good’ and some (apparently) serve a purpose when lying to young children. But irrefutable truth cannot be argued.
Neil DeGrassi Tyson recently said, “The good thing about science is that it’s true… whether or not you believe in it.”
I’d say that pretty much sums it up. Believe what you will and, in the end, the truth will set you free!
An elderly Irish woman was driving home late one night, her husband in the passenger seat. Suddenly she saw flashing lights behind her. She pulled the car over and the officer walked up to her car. She lowered the window as the officer said, “Ma’am, do you know your husband fell out of the car two miles back?”
“Oh, thank goodness,” she replied. “I thought I’d gone deaf!”
(borrowed, with permission, from a friend’s Facebook post and written by Irish comedian, Hal Roach)
Here’s hoping Irish ‘ears’ are smiling today 🙂
hellomuddah hellofadduh 