Wise Life Lessons

• Life isn’t measured by the number of breaths you take but by the number of moments that take your breath away.
• Life always offers you a second chance… It’s called tomorrow.
• Life is not about how you survive the storm – it’s about how you dance in the rain.
• The hardest thing to find in life is happiness. Money is only hard to find because it gets wasted trying to find happiness.
• The best things in life are free. The rest are too expensive.
• Math is fun – it teaches you life and death information like, when you’re cold, go to a corner because it’s 90 degrees there.

 

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Make ‘Em Laugh

Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath. She puts one foot in and pauses. She yells down the stairs, “was I getting in or out of the bath?”

The 94 year old yells back, “I don’t know, I’ll come up and see.” She starts up the stairs and pauses. Then she yells out, “was I going up the stairs or down?”

The 92 year old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea and listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, “I sure hope I never get that forgetful.” She ‘knocks on wood’ for good measure and then replies, “I’ll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who’s at the door!”