Man’s Best Friend

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A unit down the hall from ours has been vacant for several months. The owner died and her kids put it on the market. They were there so often during the end that my Dad got really attached to their dog.

Imagine our surprise when, after returning home from the doctor the other day, we saw the dog (and his human) walking in front of our building. My Dad was so happy you’d think he just won the lottery. 

Oh, to have that much power…!

10 Rhetorical Questions

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1) How could I be so stupid?

2) Marriage is a wonderful institution but who wants to live in an institution?

3) Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

4) If you see a heat wave should you wave back?

5) Why are there Braille dots on the keypad of the drive thru ATM?

6) Why are softballs hard?

7) Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?

8) Why is a professional who invests your money called a broker?

9) Why is it called a drive thru if you have to stop?

10) Why do they call it getting your dog ‘fixed’ if it doesn’t work afterwards?

Words And Phrases

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A diamond is forever – with divorce rates up, is that still true?

A dog is man’s best friend – I love dogs as much as the next person but shouldn’t your spouse be your BF?

A skeleton in the closet – let’s hope that isn’t a literal meaning.

A watched pot never boils – a quaint expression but, obviously, untrue.

I understand and appreciate the feeling cited above. But we cannot live fortune cookie lives. We can’t possibly take a few nice words (written on a small, folded piece of paper and shoved inside a dessert) seriously. We hear about tragedy and suffering on the news all day long. We see injustice and cruelty all around us. Sure, it’d be great to live in a world wearing rose-colored glasses but, eventually, reality will cross our path and bite us in the butt.

So, by all means, think positively and be considerate of those around you. But know that, against our better judgment, words CAN sometimes hurt!

A Heads Up

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The end is coming… sounds dire, right? Well, that all depends. If you truly believe in quality over quantity, you already know how to make the most of your time. Most people, when asked if they’d like to know when they’re going to die, prefer remaining ignorantly blissful. What kind of life would you have if you spent every waking hour waiting for it to end?

We are given warnings about our wellbeing since the moment we begin to understand: “Don’t touch the hot stove,” “Don’t pet the loose dog,” “Don’t smoke cigarettes,” Don’t Don’t Don’t.

All the advanced notices and ‘heads up’ in the world continue to fall on deaf ears every day. Some people are no brighter than a deer caught in the headlights of an approaching car. That’s on them. There’s an old expression, “fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on ME.” In life, you don’t always get a second chance so it’s best to keep your eyes wide open and your head up at all times!*

*especially people who walk around with their head down and their eyes glued to their phones…

Pay It Forward

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We all know about the concept of ‘paying it forward.’ Whether you’ve been on the receiving end of it or you initiated the action, it’s a positive phenomenon that can be a real game changer.

But it has its drawbacks, too.

The other day, while out shopping with my Dad, I let someone (with only two items in their hands) go ahead of me in the checkout line. Not only was he holding a place in line for someone else but that person eventually showed up with an entire full cart. Now, he could have explained that he was waiting for another person or he could have declined the offer but, instead, he pretty much guaranteed me never doing that again.

Another time, on the road, I let someone cut in front of me. One person inside of one car. As a result, an entire line of cars then proceeded to fly right through a stop sign (behind that one car) and try to squeeze in front of my car. Never again.

Yet another time I held open a door for a woman using a walker and also holding onto a dog’s leash. By the time I got to the elevator (after quickly checking my mail) she had already gotten into the elevator, closed the door and gone up to the top floor of the building – not even bothering to hold the door an extra second for me.

So, what’s the bottom line? Never go out of your way to help another human being? Only think of yourself in any and all situations? Do unto others… just don’t expect them to pay it forward (or back)? Or maybe it’s a simple case of nice guys DO finish last!

Over The Hill

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Over the hill… depending on which century you were born in, the end of that sentence could go one of two ways:

1) and through the woods to grandmother’s house we go OR

2) you old bag o’ bones

Those of us born in the 20th century most likely think of Little Red Riding Hood and The Big Bad Wolf. The rest of you probably think about the rest of US old timers. That could mean anyone over the age of 30 or pretty much anyone who still remembers:

  • cassette tapes
  • cordless phones
  • FAX machines

But, as they say, you’re only as old as you feel. Or, in dog years, you’re already dead. Or, forty isn’t old if you’re a tree. Or, once you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. Or, as I choose to think of it, I’d rather be over the hill than under it!

Dog’s Best Friend

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I can barely remember a time in my life when we didn’t have a dog. My first dog’s name was Sporty. The next one was called Sporty II (This is a custom I’ve never been fond of where, after a beloved pet dies, you run right out and get another one, just like it, and rename it as if it’s a ‘junior’).

Regardless, that’s exactly what happened when I returned home from college in my sophomore year. I couldn’t even look at this poor animal, let alone call him by my (other) dog’s name. Of course it didn’t take me long at all to fall in love with this dopey dog-clone (I mean that in the nicest way as most black labs ARE kinda dopey).

Then, last in a line of large, not-too-bright dogs, came Sheeba. She was found as a young pup, having been thrown away in a garbage can. A friend of the family immediately called us – knowing we would, without hesitation, take on this poor, discarded dog. And we did. And we were sure that, when her life ended, we were done having dogs. And we were… until Jett.

Jett was adopted when my kids were fairly young (we had lost another dog, Ricky – a Chihuahua/Terrier mix – before that. Ricky survived life in the city, getting snuck into school while I attended Juilliard, my marriage, my firstborn, my second born and then a few years more till he was just shy of 15).

Sadly, Jett came to us with a lot of baggage that we weren’t fully capable of handling at the end. So off to my devoted parents he went for his last year of life. And he lived a very spoiled life – spending most of his time in a doggie diaper, on my Dad’s lap, in front of the tv.

So, now, my Dad spends as much time as he can, petting and talking to all the dogs in our building. It’s not the same (by any means) as having his own, but they can all somehow sense that he is truly dog’s best friend!

#AdoptAPet #ClearTheShelters #SpayAndNeuter #MansBestFriend